12/16/2023 0 Comments Couples finances forumUse that to maintain balance during your money talks. And don’t just hear your spouse’s concerns-really listen to them and look for the truth in what they say. status.īeing aware of your differences is the first step to actually being able to appreciate them. But being different isn’t bad-in fact, it’s really important. I talk a lot about being aware of each other’s differences, like nerd vs. You already know men and women are different. Recognize-and appreciate-your differences. If you’re struggling to get on the same page with your spouse, use these seven steps to restore the peace.ġ. Money fights and money problems are painful. It's not children, sex, in-laws or anything else. Divorce: Professor of family studies Sonya Britt said, “Arguments about money are by far the top predictor of divorce.A lack of trust: When money is a constant source of tension, it breaks down trust in the relationship.Poor health: Study after study shows that money stress can negatively impact your blood pressure, back and muscle pain, mental health and more.Financial infidelity: One-third of people who argue with their spouse about money say they’ve hidden a purchase from their spouse because they knew their partner wouldn’t approve. A lack of shared dreams: 45% of couples who describe their marriage as “okay” or “in crisis” avoid discussing their money dreams together.It trickles down to all aspects of your marriage and your life. The reality is that fighting over money isn’t just holding you back financially. How Fighting Over Money Impacts Your Marriageįor a lot of couples, money fights aren’t just a small bump in the road. Or maybe it’s a purchase you just don’t think the family needs right now-or one you’re sure you do need. Whatever the reason you find yourself arguing about money, it’s stealing your trust, your peace, your communication and your fun from your marriage. Maybe it’s an expected bill that hits at just the wrong time or an unplanned loan to a family member. Or maybe money conversations in your house aren’t loud, but there’s an underlying tension that creeps to the surface every now and then.īudget battles come in all shapes and sizes. The neighbor outside looks up from pruning his rose bushes. Over the next 30 minutes, the conversation slowly evolves into a heated discussion, and you’re at odds with the person you love the most-again. Your spouse gets defensive, and the game of verbal tennis begins. So, under your breath, you say, “Must be nice to just be able to spend money like that without running it by me.” You’ve lived out some version of the story before: You’ve both had a long day at work, the kids are bouncing off the walls, and your spouse casually mentions that they just spent $75 on something fun for themselves. When Arguing About Money Becomes the Norm This is why working through your money issues in a healthy way is actually more valuable than the money itself. Money is the number one issue married couples fight about, and it’s consistently a leading cause of divorce. Love puts no limits on topics for conversation-but if you’re constantly fighting over money, it’s not something you want to bring up.
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